***stardust

There's a girl on my buddylist, I don't think I've ever IMed her, I've only spoken to her irl a few times... but at the end of her profile, she says: 'do you ever wish you could change the past? I do... every single day.'
That makes me so sad..... it really does.

I've had a splendid few days... very quiet, but very good. It's been *gorgeous* weather, my afternoons have been spent laying out in the backyard, getting some colour back into my skin, watching the fish and tadpoles in the pond for hours at a time, writing my fic for megs (was on a roll today, three pages front-and-back ^___^), and just looking around me, enjoying the lumenescent green of the warm sun shining through the leaves of the trees and the plants in the garden... the world is so beautiful, it truly is. And it's so easy to overlook that, oh, hey, the sun's out today, how nice! and then go on with sitting around the house in the dimness doing various types of nothing. Granted, sitting out back, I don't do much either, but somehow, it's very much a nicer sort of nothing, drinking in the sun and the beauty of God's world out there.

I have my regrets, yeah, and somedays, yeah, they get me down...but how can you let yourself dwell on them? I'm not saying we should all be hyper-happy all the time, not at all, God knows I'm not, but... I don't know. There's so much beauty, in every little thing... how can you keep yourself blind to everything but your own self-labeled mistakes?

I think people just need to go outside more. ~_^

We were going to go to Letchworth for Father's Day, but the good car's still in the shop, and Dad didn't want to risk taking the little blue car on that long of a drive, so we ended up just sitting around outside, Dad helping Mel with a bit of studying for her French exam, sitting in the shade, Matt joining them for a bit, while I lay out in the grass in the sun and gazed inot the pond, watching the tadpoles munching on the bits of algae growing on the poump-pipe, or the plants, looking down into the depths of the pond, looking around for the much larger bullfrog tadpoles, or the fish... I got out my camera after awhile, and took pictures around the pond and the yard.. and got what should be a pretty good one of merani-chan when she wasn't looking. *g*
Then in the evening Dad built a nice little bonfire, and he and Beth sat out there awhile, Mel and I joining them with our stories to work on after awhile. When the fire had died down a bit, we toasted a few marshmellows - I'm out of practise, I kept burning mine, and I usually don't at all >_< ... Mel was being spastic, which amused me to no end... came inside, talked with Mel a bit--or, rather, laughed at her as she bounced around the kitchen spinning in circles and things..*mad giggles*

But yeah. Did copious amounts of writing today, and though it's an angsty story overall, it's a nice bright shimmery sweet scene that's in there now... yay for U2 being the best band ever. ^_^ (I just need to go back through at some point and find words other than shimmering and shining and all these sparkly, star-like things I keep using...) Am a little sunburnt, but not bad - instead of laying out there frying this year, I'm trying to remember not to stay out there too long at a time. Less painful, for one, and probably better for me, thinking about it... *shrugs* It's not really that I lie out there for hours in the sun with the sole intent of "tanning" (which is usually much more burning for me), it's that it's nice out in the sun, and the shade's too cold and the sun feels better anyway, and I can't just sit inside on days like today. Okay, so not being ghostly-white is nice too, but..y'know. I'd still be out there even if it didn't colour my skin at all. ^_^

Newsboys are also absolutely wonderful. I need to get 'Thrive' one of these days... good stuff. <3

Alright. Back to typing now, still have another page front-and-back to go, plus I edited some bits of earlier portions... whee for readily-flowing creativity. ^_^

*Ananda Daydream * 6:18 PM * *

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