Reading:
        PThe Nightingale and the Rose, Oscar Wilde

        Audiobooking:
        The Sorrows of Young Werther, Goethe


        Watching:
        Farscape


        Doing:
        Way behind on all crochet.
        It is NaNoNovember!






        anandadaydream's Profile Page



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        Amaranthus, continued (NaNoWriMo 2010)
        untitled (2009)
        untitled (2008)
        Amaranthus (NaNoWriMo 2007)
        untitled (2006)
        Beneath the Dust (2005)
        Mortal Angel (2005)

        quid pro quo
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        the quote lists:
        2004-2005
        summer 2004
        2003-2004
        (rest to come once I get them online again~)


          the massive archives:
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          04/21/2002 - 04/28/2002
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9.16.2004
 
Antisocialness and lonliness do not go well together.

And I know it's my own damn fault for never talking, but... *sighs*

It's not so easy for me.


...meanwhile, my own damn housemates have decided we-- excuse me, they - I was only just now invited by Britt - are going to the animal shelter on Saturday to look for a cat. (No, they're still not allowed, and yes, we were going to try to talk the landlord into letting us..which I really, really wish we'd do, but they've apparently decided that since we *can* sneak it around him, we should...)

I did ask Britt when all this was decided and why I hadn't known, she said they were talking about it a few days ago..I said yeah, but I didn't know anything was actually finalised...
Britt said it was while I was in my room, talking to Megs, and no-one disturbs me when I'm talking to Megs cos I get cranky.
Very cranky.
Really.

...it hurts more when they leave me out of everything entirely, they could have at least included me, instead of just a "oh if you want to come on Saturday, you'd have to get up early but we're going to Jamestown..."
Yeah I get a lil testy sometimes when my time with Megs is interrupted, and I'm all antsy to get back, but that's cos it's usually over something random and silly.

*sighs* ..but I always get down when I'm not feeling well, and I've been feeling rather lonely for a week or so to begin with anyway...very much on the outside of everything, and alone......and I know a fair bit of it's my own fault, but... there just hasn't really been anyone for me to talk to.

Megs...I can't wait until you're here, I keep telling myself it'll be alright again once you are.....

...only at the same time, I know how much it's gonna tear me apart to say goodbye to you again, and how hard the days after are going to be.....


..but enough from me, this is anything but productive. I should go out and hang out with my housemates in the other room... whether I feel I'm just some random person taking up space around here or not, that's not gonna have a chance to change if I just sit here and mope.
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