Yeah..gorgeous afternoon turned grey, but that was okay...got a little chilly, tho, so I only dozed for a bit...got thru some of that poetry, tho..good stuff...and had a lot of nice, semi-drowzy random thoughts...

Suburbs only look nice in the bright sunlight, yellow sun blue sky green lawns...
..yet Nature looks beautiful in any weather, grey day can be as lovely as a sun-filled one...

What is it about words that make something so beautiful, art...? Something can be beautiful, incredible, but adding words...makes it look cooler, more soul-artist...but not just that...there's a beauty in words partly in the look of letters, of handwriting...partly in the meaning, in just the feel of them...
...why? how are we so geared to words? [In the beginning, God said let there be light..?] ..because sometimes words can speak so much...but nearly always they fail us, there are so many things beyond the power of words to express...
...just..being able to communicate something to the world, I suppose...art can, music can, but words are often easiest, and are most likely to be correctly understood, clear...maybe not always precise because we all see hear feel words differently, like colours, words are colours, even as notes of music are, as all are emotion... but what one sees one way, another sees another way, what's light bright blue is beautiful to me, the sky above, radiant colour and comfortable calm and life and love...but to another it's cold, it's ice...like music, what moves one person's soul another can't always understand...

The ground holds still
   the winter's chill
Tho the sun try to impart her Golden Warmth.
Its cold breath remains
   what little it gains
Not even the warmth of life it draws from me
does it retain.

 
..but gonna print out some poetry first... This I actually saw in my AP Eng. review book, and it looked kinda interesting, tho I've still gotta read it closer...but there's all this colour stuff, which's always cool. -_^...dude, they've got *all* of Dante's The Divine Comedy on everypoet.com...crazy...but I'm *not* gonna print all that out!..just a part for now...would like to read it sometime, tho..hrm..need to get up to the library again..tho I *should* be (re-)reading Salman Rushdie's The Satanic Verses, for that essay I've gotta write...ehh...poetry for now. ^_^...lessee...Oscar Wilde...this might be interesting, know I've heard *of* it..aaaand..lessee...maybe this one...
^_^
But enough...my gorgeous afternoon'll be gone by the time I get out there if I keep this up!

 
Dude! ..hope for this city yet! The Smithereens are playing the Rochester Music Fest in July!!! Which *rocks*...
..'course, this also just rubs it in that they're really not so big, cos they're playing the Rochesrt Music Fest...ah well...
..so long's they don't cancel out, like every other decent-sized performer has every other year...

Meanwhile, the weather's *gorgeous*, it's...lessee....dude! 77 frickin' degrees out! Woo! ..and it's April...ahhhh.... so yeah. I'm headed out back with my Joshua Tree cd, maybe a sketchbook...an' I'm gonna go take a nap. ^_^

 
In God's Country
(Bono)

Desert sky, dream beneath the desert sky.
The rivers run but soon run dry.
We need new dreams tonight.
Desert rose, dreamed I saw a desert rose
Dress torn in ribbons and bows
Like a siren she calls (to me).

Sleep comes like a drug in God's country
Sad eyes, crooked crosses, in God's country

Set me alight, we'll punch a hole right through the night.
Every day the dreamers die to see what's on the other side.
She is liberty, and she comes to rescue me.
Hope, faith, her vanity
The greatest gift is gold.

Sleep comes like a drug in God's country
Sad eyes, crooked crosses, in God's country

Naked flame, she stands with a naked flame
I stand with the sons of Cain
Burned by the fire of love
Burned by the fire of love.

...awesome...every line of it's just, perfect, so much of it's just...yeah...gah...ok, so I lack analytical skills tonight! You can read it yourself, just look at each line..and you'll see the genius that is Bono. -_^

 
Gah! Sweet! ...was on my way to go find the lyrics to "In God's Country", and stumbled across the happy news that U2's got a *bunch* of new stuff ready...new album very possibly soon!!! ^_^...but I'll save this for a post on the U2 blog...

 
..gah....my photography teacher is just...generally....dumb....seriously, she gives us an assignment to do in photoshop? and *all* you need do is click about five times, and you're done. You don't even need to have *any* artistic talent to make it look cool! No talent needed, just the ability to click a mouse in the right location. ...*sigh*...and photoshop can do *so* much more! Ooo, we're getting tricky now, aren't we, using *two* filters on *one* picture! *gaspo!*... <-sarcasm, in case you missed it.
The up side to this is, that I got creatively frustrated by this. And thus, spent some time on my *own* creation...with a pic of myself, for once, oddly enough. -_^ Lotsa fun... tho I've realised that working with just black and white's a little trickier'n colour...hafta be more creative with solutions to things like, getting words to blend in well enough that they don't stick out, yet are still readable...
See, now *this* is the kind of problem solving I can do.
Just not math...God, my head *truly* felt like it was going to explode after calc this morning...and then again, after calc review this evening...blah...
...but it was *gorgeous* out today! Spent some time outside for gym...we were supposed to be walking around the track or playing frisbee, and we walked for awhile..then I spotted the giant cushion-things that the pole-vaulters use to land on? yeah. And I was very very tired today...so I'm like, dude, guys, I wonder just how soft those are..? ...man..they're awesome, you just sink right in...*G*...so I laid there for a bit, soaking in the sun, it was wonderful.....then when I got home today, took my headphones out back, laid down in the yard, listened to U2's Joshua Tree and nearly fell asleep in the warm sunlight....ahhhh....
...btw... "In God's Country" is, once again, a great, great song. I knew this, but I've been reminded of it again. ^_^ ..actually, that whole album..incredible....love it...
But yeah. Need to study for music history test tomorrow....

 
*happy sigh*.....I do love poetry now...*giggle* I feel like such a bookworm geek now, falling in love with poetry (actually having a fav poet!), falling in love with Shakespeare, and with Cyrano de Bergerac... (Not to in *any* way put these things down! Laur, Cyrano rocks. ^_^) ..this's just...new to me, is all.
But I still hate Dickens. He really *was* a sick, sick man, who should never've been allowed to set pen to paper...tormenting his poor characters so...gah...
..wish I had some more time tonight, would like to get thru some of Oscar Wilde's poetry...Dorian Grey had some wonderful passages in it...loved the book, really. Hated it and loved it, Lord Henry pissed me off so very much, I disagreed with everything he said..but it made sense..and tho when you step back you realise you hate what these characters are, who they make themselves to be..when you're reading it, you love them all...it's crazy...tho I hated some of what Dorian did, I loved him...and Basil, I just loved, felt so very sorry for..but I could sympathize with him so well...
...ah...the joys of literature. ^_^ I could go on all night...
...unfortunately, some less-lovable mad demons of the past invented this form of evil entitled *hissing out words like the demon who created them surely did* mathematics, and also calculus...

Hrm. ...dear...I'm getting superfluous again, aren't I? This is what happens when I spend too much literary time, and I've been writing more than drawing the past week or so..and reading Hamlet and poetry...ah...though I love it so...

"There comes a wanton pair of doves,
Who settle down, and, nodding, strut
O'er the gold sands beside the stream,
And gradually approach;
Their red-tinged eyes, so full of love,
Soon see the inward-sorrowing one.
The male, inquisitively social, leaps
On the next bush, and looks
Upon him kindly and complacently.
"Thou sorrowest," murmurs he:
"Be of good cheer, my friend!
All that is needed for calm happiness
Hast thou not here?..."
-from "The Eagle and Dove", Goethe

 
Ah.....
I never used to get poetry. I really didn't, for a very long time, didn't do anything for me. But now...
Thank you, Mrs. Westby!!!
She's gone thru so much poetry with us this year, and I don't know if it's more the way she taught it, or just that my own understanding's increased, or some combination thereof...but I love a lot of it now. Frost still annoys me, cos he's just so..I dunno.. lalala, isn't nature pretty?...and some of it's nice but it's too..I dunno...staid..complacent..something...for me... Dickenson's on the opposite end of the scale, she's just..gah...psycho...(*thinking wanna-be-goth Teraa should read some Dickenson--!*)... ..but I just find these lines that're just...gorgeous...that give me that same feeling of...I don't even know what to call it...just that wonderful emotion that just swells up and fills your soul and every corner of your being with its beauty...
And a lot of it probably has to do with the fact that I've realised poetry is lyrics, they're music..music without sound but sometimes just as effective...

"Vanish, dark clouds on high,

Offspring of night!
Let a more radiant beam
Through the blue ether gleam,

Charming the sight!
Would the dark clouds on high

Melt into air!
Stars glimmer tenderly,

Planets more fair

Shed their soft light.
Spirits of heav'nly birth,
Fairer than sons of earth,
Quivering emotions true ..."
-from "Chorus of Spirits", from Faust, by Goethe.

..which reminds me...Faust is something Ananda needs to go find to read...

 
His soul stretched tight across the skies
That fade behind a city block,
Or trampled by insistent feet
At four and five and six o'clock
[...]
I am moved by fancies that are curled
Around these images, and cling:
The notion of some infinitely gentle
Infinitely suffering thing.
-from "Preludes", by T.S. Eliot.

Yeah, go check out everypoet.com, looks like it's pretty good...got a decent selection of T.S. Eliot. ^_^
Really. Go. Now. Don't waste your time here anymore. Well, first, go follow the link on the left to the hunger site and donate some food to starving people (for free!). *Then* go and read, like, Rhapsody on a Windy Night. Which's..incredible...
..wish they had like, "Ash Wednesday" up, but...

"Dissolve the floors of memory
And all its clear relations,
Its divisions and precisions,
Every street lamp that I pass
Beats like a fatalistic drum..."
-from Rhapsody on a Windy Night, by T.S. Eliot

 

You are T.S. Eliot
Your are introspective and have an affinity for creatures that purr. You also have a tendency to doubt yourself. You can see the beauty in the world - don't let it pass you by!

Take the Which Poet are You? Quiz - brought to you out of boredom and pretention!

^_^ ..okay, so really, I'm about six different poets..but it *told* me to pick my fav outta the ones it gave me, so I did. *g*
<3 T.S. Eliot, I really do...*great* stuff...

So yes. Steve's random description of me today? "Decadent." ..I'm like, What?!..that's like, Macphisto. *giggle*..but I'd been working on my latest fic, and our fav 'phisto is in it, sooo...yeah. But really..got my awesome shiny red pants, my black t-shirt that says ROCK in lotsa glittter, Macphisto-boots, some bracelets etc...still am not sure how this warrented "decadent"...Laur wasn't sure on the definition he was going for, so Steve and I tried to explain the term (as it is used regarding things *other* than hot fudge sundaes *g*)...flamboyant, but more sophitcatedly so...like Macphisto, but not evil, just...pompous, sorta, ornate/luxuriant-ish...and Steve decided "darkly beautiful". I'm like, wait a sec, this's *me* here, what're you on about?? ...but with Steve, one never really knows...
..can't WAIT til spring break...just two more days of school, then FREEDOM!..relatively..for a week, but hey, better'n nothin'...Daf and Laur and I have *got* to get together, tho...an' like, not have Laur fall asleep within three hours...*g*...got some major things to discuss...like "Calypso"...and, y'know, intensely important things like whether Aragorn is in fact a drummer or a bass player. -_^ (*I* say drummer...Daf says bass player, and so did Laur, but now she's wavering...*g*)
Hrm. Should really do math hw...tho I really don't care, already had some math today - most likely failed the test I made up..but I figure even a two is better'n a zero, so it couldn't really *hurt* me...would obviously be better it I did well, but...*shrug*...does it *really* matter? I've already been accepted to SUNY Fredonia...and whether or not I get college credit is dependent solely on the AP..which there are these nice review sessions for that I'm going to...
Whatever. ..I need some good music to listen to....hrmmmm...what'm I in the mood for?
Ah, I know. U2's Joshua Tree. Was listening to it last night when I went to bed, fell asleep about..mm.."Red Hill Minig Town", I think.
Yet, did I have U2-dreams? NO. What *did* I dream about??
A guy dressed up in a pink Elvis Santa suit.
I am not kidding. I wish I was. ...we were on some trip...at a thruway stop, like the ones in Italy that're up high? and there was some guy (who reminds me of someone, tho I can't place who) dressed up in a pink santa suit, with an elvis hairdo and stuff, and...man...was weird...and his legs were broken..or something..and his girlfriend couldn't get him up the stairs, I went to go help..and he was all psycho-depressed about it and stuff..and I couldn't help but think of how well Pat Jenkins was dealing with *his* broken leg...(which's actually *real*, and I'd been thinking about that earlier in the day, actually)...
But yeah. It was utterly bizarre...

 
..oh dear..not lookin' like I'll be gettin' as much math done as is needed...but I give up anyways, I'll not get it, no matter how much time I spend on it!...
...
..and I just found U2's Boudoir...
*mega-giant GRIN*

 
But really...besides stupidevilmath, had a pretty good day...
Come into school this morning, was talkin' to Laurel and Daf, we were comparing all the really odd dreams we'd had over the weekend... and Laur... she had one that U2 was in, and someone, she thinks it was Edge, said:
"To Bono, truth is truth. To Adam, truth is something you tell two minutes later."
;D ...I thought it was great...that's just....oh...*so* full of potential--! *G* ..so I told Laur, I think she and I and Daf should each - seperately, without consulting each other at all - write a fanfic around that line... *giant-semi-evil-grin*
In photography, the Machead and I had to take digital pics of each other for a class assignment...and Brandon decided to join us. So we played around with the thing for most of class...took all these stupid pics of Brandon..it was great, he like, clung to the wall (at which point I started singing "The Fly" *G*)...jumped up and grabbed one of the beams overhead (no ceilings in the school, remember? construction and a cheap school board..), hung from it...stood one-handed...*so* much fun! ^_^
Yeah. And lunch today? Oh dear...had to've been the most..educational? thing in quite awhile--! ..yeah...Steve, Jeff Laley, and Ka started going off on the best and worst ways to die...which ah, got interesting pretty quickly..Jeff was of the opinion that the worst death was to be pecked to death by ducks, while Steve and Ka just kept coming up with worse and worse things..I found out that the term Irom Maiden is something besides an 80s death-metal band (which, sadly enough, was news to me!)...and from there we got discussion on all sorts of lovely things...learnt what an enema actually is...learnt how guys are tested for STDs - which, I will say, *Steve* even cringed and shuddered at!...meanwhile, I think poor Laur and Bethie were just...dying. ;) ...they..can only take so much beyond-PG-talk...and this was waaaayyyy too much for them... ...meanwhile, I was actually laughing at a lot of this..which's terrible...ah well... *g*
See, now my own personal worst death would be like, seeing Bono and/or Larry like, five feet away from me, they see me, and are about to talk to me...and then I died. Instantly. That would really, really suck.
Now, upon hearing *that*, Steve & co. automatically made it worse... "What about if you threw up on Bono first, then died?..."
X-|
Economics wasn't so cool, cos Chris was, as usual, being a complete arsehole...which's nothing new, and usually I can put up with it...but today, he poked me so much that my shoulder-area was actually *sore*! ..then he threw my pen towards the garbage..and moved my desk on me..and...arg.
Ah well...
...I don't wanna do my math hw...don't wanna go to math tomorrow...I do dread it, so very very much...it's terrible.....how can I get to the point where I just don't care anymore?...
...*sigh*...

 
I HATE AP CALC.
..not that this is news, at all, but...*sigh*....hateithateithateit!!! ..and really, so very soon, it'll all be pointless, not a tinge of relevancy or anything to it...but for now, I've gotta keep my grades up...*arg!*...just today, was down in guidence getting another copy of my transcript, and they gave me a nice little certificate saying that I'm a Nat'l Merit Finalist..and Mr. Olsen's making his usual big huge spiel, "you should be so honoured...your mom's gonna want to put this up on the fridge, then frame it..[never mind that he should prolly know that I don't live with my mom..!]..don't just brush this off, do you know how few people get this?..", etc etc etc...meanwhile, I'm just like, uh-huh, I knew about this *months* ago..and I noticed the letter the thing came with on his desk. Dated February 4. ..the onyl reason I actually got it today was cos I was down there...
But anyway, the point I was gonna make before I got sidetracked... I'm the only one in my grade at school to be semi-finalist/finalist for Nat'l Merit. ...and...I can't even get a single answer on my math homework. Not a single answer to the bookwork...and the review? it's review, you'd think I might be able to understand it now, going back to it?..no. And we've a quiz tomorrow on a ton of formulas..and I've still got a test to make up, somehow, in the next few days...
..and I don't get *any* of it!
"..and what am I to do? just tell me what am I supposed to say?..." -"Rejoice", U2

*Ananda Daydream * 8:44 PM * (0) stars grow bright *

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