Reading:
        PThe Nightingale and the Rose, Oscar Wilde

        Audiobooking:
        The Sorrows of Young Werther, Goethe


        Watching:
        Farscape


        Doing:
        Way behind on all crochet.
        It is NaNoNovember!






        anandadaydream's Profile Page



        blogger profile
        library thing
        last.fm
        facebook







        desert songs
        amaranth and jasmine
        emulsion01
        my lj

        

        Amaranthus, continued (NaNoWriMo 2010)
        untitled (2009)
        untitled (2008)
        Amaranthus (NaNoWriMo 2007)
        untitled (2006)
        Beneath the Dust (2005)
        Mortal Angel (2005)

        quid pro quo
        modernday phoenix
        life of a naturefreak

        xkcd
        yu+me
        lesbian pirates
        questionable content
        the dreamer
        joe the circle

        101 cookbooks
        threadless
        i can haz cheezburger
        blogger

        the hunger site
        care2
        the ONE campaign
        amnesty international

        

        the quote lists:
        2004-2005
        summer 2004
        2003-2004
        (rest to come once I get them online again~)


          the massive archives:
          12/09/2001 - 12/16/2001
          12/16/2001 - 12/23/2001
          12/23/2001 - 12/30/2001
          12/30/2001 - 01/06/2002
          01/06/2002 - 01/13/2002
          01/13/2002 - 01/20/2002
          01/20/2002 - 01/27/2002
          01/27/2002 - 02/03/2002
          02/03/2002 - 02/10/2002
          02/10/2002 - 02/17/2002
          02/17/2002 - 02/24/2002
          02/24/2002 - 03/03/2002
          03/03/2002 - 03/10/2002
          03/10/2002 - 03/17/2002
          03/17/2002 - 03/24/2002
          03/24/2002 - 03/31/2002
          03/31/2002 - 04/07/2002
          04/07/2002 - 04/14/2002
          04/14/2002 - 04/21/2002
          04/21/2002 - 04/28/2002
          04/28/2002 - 05/05/2002
          05/05/2002 - 05/12/2002
          05/12/2002 - 05/19/2002
          05/19/2002 - 05/26/2002
          05/26/2002 - 06/02/2002
          06/02/2002 - 06/09/2002
          06/09/2002 - 06/16/2002
          06/16/2002 - 06/23/2002
          06/23/2002 - 06/30/2002
          06/30/2002 - 07/07/2002
          07/07/2002 - 07/14/2002
          07/14/2002 - 07/21/2002
          07/21/2002 - 07/28/2002
          07/28/2002 - 08/04/2002
          08/04/2002 - 08/11/2002
          08/11/2002 - 08/18/2002
          08/18/2002 - 08/25/2002
          08/25/2002 - 09/01/2002
          09/01/2002 - 09/08/2002
          09/08/2002 - 09/15/2002
          09/15/2002 - 09/22/2002
          09/22/2002 - 09/29/2002
          09/29/2002 - 10/06/2002
          10/06/2002 - 10/13/2002
          10/13/2002 - 10/20/2002
          10/20/2002 - 10/27/2002
          10/27/2002 - 11/03/2002
          11/03/2002 - 11/10/2002
          11/10/2002 - 11/17/2002
          11/17/2002 - 11/24/2002
          11/24/2002 - 12/01/2002
          12/01/2002 - 12/08/2002
          12/08/2002 - 12/15/2002
          12/29/2002 - 01/05/2003
          01/05/2003 - 01/12/2003
          01/12/2003 - 01/19/2003
          01/19/2003 - 01/26/2003
          01/26/2003 - 02/02/2003
          02/02/2003 - 02/09/2003
          02/09/2003 - 02/16/2003
          02/16/2003 - 02/23/2003
          02/23/2003 - 03/02/2003
          03/02/2003 - 03/09/2003
          03/09/2003 - 03/16/2003
          03/16/2003 - 03/23/2003
          03/30/2003 - 04/06/2003
          04/13/2003 - 04/20/2003
          04/20/2003 - 04/27/2003
          04/27/2003 - 05/04/2003
          05/11/2003 - 05/18/2003
          05/18/2003 - 05/25/2003
          05/25/2003 - 06/01/2003
          06/01/2003 - 06/08/2003
          06/08/2003 - 06/15/2003
          06/15/2003 - 06/22/2003
          06/22/2003 - 06/29/2003
          06/29/2003 - 07/06/2003
          07/06/2003 - 07/13/2003
          07/13/2003 - 07/20/2003
          07/20/2003 - 07/27/2003
          07/27/2003 - 08/03/2003
          08/03/2003 - 08/10/2003
          08/10/2003 - 08/17/2003
          08/17/2003 - 08/24/2003
          08/24/2003 - 08/31/2003
          08/31/2003 - 09/07/2003
          09/07/2003 - 09/14/2003
          09/14/2003 - 09/21/2003
          09/21/2003 - 09/28/2003
          09/28/2003 - 10/05/2003
          10/05/2003 - 10/12/2003
          10/12/2003 - 10/19/2003
          10/19/2003 - 10/26/2003
          10/26/2003 - 11/02/2003
          11/02/2003 - 11/09/2003
          11/16/2003 - 11/23/2003
          11/23/2003 - 11/30/2003
          12/14/2003 - 12/21/2003
          12/21/2003 - 12/28/2003
          12/28/2003 - 01/04/2004
          01/04/2004 - 01/11/2004
          01/11/2004 - 01/18/2004
          01/18/2004 - 01/25/2004
          01/25/2004 - 02/01/2004
          02/01/2004 - 02/08/2004
          02/15/2004 - 02/22/2004
          02/22/2004 - 02/29/2004
          02/29/2004 - 03/07/2004
          03/07/2004 - 03/14/2004
          03/14/2004 - 03/21/2004
          03/21/2004 - 03/28/2004
          04/11/2004 - 04/18/2004
          05/16/2004 - 05/23/2004
          05/23/2004 - 05/30/2004
          05/30/2004 - 06/06/2004
          06/13/2004 - 06/20/2004
          06/27/2004 - 07/04/2004
          07/04/2004 - 07/11/2004
          07/11/2004 - 07/18/2004
          07/18/2004 - 07/25/2004
          07/25/2004 - 08/01/2004
          08/01/2004 - 08/08/2004
          08/08/2004 - 08/15/2004
          08/15/2004 - 08/22/2004
          08/22/2004 - 08/29/2004
          08/29/2004 - 09/05/2004
          09/05/2004 - 09/12/2004
          09/12/2004 - 09/19/2004
          09/19/2004 - 09/26/2004
          09/26/2004 - 10/03/2004
          10/03/2004 - 10/10/2004
          10/10/2004 - 10/17/2004
          10/17/2004 - 10/24/2004
          10/24/2004 - 10/31/2004
          10/31/2004 - 11/07/2004
          11/07/2004 - 11/14/2004
          11/14/2004 - 11/21/2004
          11/21/2004 - 11/28/2004
          11/28/2004 - 12/05/2004
          12/05/2004 - 12/12/2004
          12/12/2004 - 12/19/2004
          12/19/2004 - 12/26/2004
          12/26/2004 - 01/02/2005
          01/02/2005 - 01/09/2005
          01/09/2005 - 01/16/2005
          01/16/2005 - 01/23/2005
          01/23/2005 - 01/30/2005
          01/30/2005 - 02/06/2005
          02/06/2005 - 02/13/2005
          02/13/2005 - 02/20/2005
          02/20/2005 - 02/27/2005
          02/27/2005 - 03/06/2005
          03/06/2005 - 03/13/2005
          03/13/2005 - 03/20/2005
          03/20/2005 - 03/27/2005
          03/27/2005 - 04/03/2005
          04/03/2005 - 04/10/2005
          04/10/2005 - 04/17/2005
          04/17/2005 - 04/24/2005
          04/24/2005 - 05/01/2005
          05/01/2005 - 05/08/2005
          05/08/2005 - 05/15/2005
          05/15/2005 - 05/22/2005
          05/22/2005 - 05/29/2005
          06/05/2005 - 06/12/2005
          06/26/2005 - 07/03/2005
          07/24/2005 - 07/31/2005
          07/31/2005 - 08/07/2005
          08/07/2005 - 08/14/2005
          08/14/2005 - 08/21/2005
          08/21/2005 - 08/28/2005
          08/28/2005 - 09/04/2005
          09/04/2005 - 09/11/2005
          09/11/2005 - 09/18/2005
          10/09/2005 - 10/16/2005
          10/30/2005 - 11/06/2005
          11/13/2005 - 11/20/2005
          11/20/2005 - 11/27/2005
          12/04/2005 - 12/11/2005
          12/11/2005 - 12/18/2005
          12/18/2005 - 12/25/2005
          01/29/2006 - 02/05/2006
          02/05/2006 - 02/12/2006
          02/19/2006 - 02/26/2006
          02/26/2006 - 03/05/2006
          03/05/2006 - 03/12/2006
          03/12/2006 - 03/19/2006
          06/18/2006 - 06/25/2006
          06/25/2006 - 07/02/2006
          07/02/2006 - 07/09/2006
          07/09/2006 - 07/16/2006
          07/16/2006 - 07/23/2006
          07/23/2006 - 07/30/2006
          07/30/2006 - 08/06/2006
          08/06/2006 - 08/13/2006
          08/27/2006 - 09/03/2006
          09/03/2006 - 09/10/2006
          09/10/2006 - 09/17/2006
          09/17/2006 - 09/24/2006
          09/24/2006 - 10/01/2006
          10/08/2006 - 10/15/2006
          10/15/2006 - 10/22/2006
          10/29/2006 - 11/05/2006
          11/05/2006 - 11/12/2006
          11/12/2006 - 11/19/2006
          11/19/2006 - 11/26/2006
          03/25/2007 - 04/01/2007
          04/01/2007 - 04/08/2007
          04/08/2007 - 04/15/2007
          04/15/2007 - 04/22/2007
          04/22/2007 - 04/29/2007
          04/29/2007 - 05/06/2007
          05/06/2007 - 05/13/2007
          05/20/2007 - 05/27/2007
          07/15/2007 - 07/22/2007
          09/02/2007 - 09/09/2007
          09/09/2007 - 09/16/2007
          09/23/2007 - 09/30/2007
          09/30/2007 - 10/07/2007
          10/07/2007 - 10/14/2007
          10/14/2007 - 10/21/2007
          10/21/2007 - 10/28/2007
          10/28/2007 - 11/04/2007
          11/04/2007 - 11/11/2007
          11/11/2007 - 11/18/2007
          11/18/2007 - 11/25/2007
          11/25/2007 - 12/02/2007
          12/02/2007 - 12/09/2007
          01/06/2008 - 01/13/2008
          01/20/2008 - 01/27/2008
          02/03/2008 - 02/10/2008
          02/10/2008 - 02/17/2008
          02/24/2008 - 03/02/2008
          03/02/2008 - 03/09/2008
          03/09/2008 - 03/16/2008
          03/16/2008 - 03/23/2008
          03/30/2008 - 04/06/2008
          04/13/2008 - 04/20/2008
          10/19/2008 - 10/26/2008
          10/26/2008 - 11/02/2008
          11/02/2008 - 11/09/2008
          11/09/2008 - 11/16/2008
          11/16/2008 - 11/23/2008
          11/30/2008 - 12/07/2008
          12/07/2008 - 12/14/2008
          12/28/2008 - 01/04/2009
          01/04/2009 - 01/11/2009
          01/11/2009 - 01/18/2009
          01/18/2009 - 01/25/2009
          01/25/2009 - 02/01/2009
          02/01/2009 - 02/08/2009
          02/08/2009 - 02/15/2009
          02/15/2009 - 02/22/2009
          02/22/2009 - 03/01/2009
          03/01/2009 - 03/08/2009
          03/08/2009 - 03/15/2009
          03/15/2009 - 03/22/2009
          04/12/2009 - 04/19/2009
          04/19/2009 - 04/26/2009
          04/26/2009 - 05/03/2009
          05/03/2009 - 05/10/2009
          05/10/2009 - 05/17/2009
          05/17/2009 - 05/24/2009
          06/07/2009 - 06/14/2009
          06/14/2009 - 06/21/2009
          06/21/2009 - 06/28/2009
          08/02/2009 - 08/09/2009
          08/23/2009 - 08/30/2009
          09/06/2009 - 09/13/2009
          09/13/2009 - 09/20/2009
          09/27/2009 - 10/04/2009
          10/11/2009 - 10/18/2009
          11/01/2009 - 11/08/2009
          11/08/2009 - 11/15/2009
          11/15/2009 - 11/22/2009
          11/22/2009 - 11/29/2009
          11/29/2009 - 12/06/2009
          12/06/2009 - 12/13/2009
          01/10/2010 - 01/17/2010
          02/07/2010 - 02/14/2010
          02/21/2010 - 02/28/2010
          02/28/2010 - 03/07/2010
          03/07/2010 - 03/14/2010
          03/14/2010 - 03/21/2010
          03/21/2010 - 03/28/2010
          04/04/2010 - 04/11/2010
          04/11/2010 - 04/18/2010
          04/18/2010 - 04/25/2010
          04/25/2010 - 05/02/2010
          05/02/2010 - 05/09/2010
          05/09/2010 - 05/16/2010
          05/16/2010 - 05/23/2010
          05/23/2010 - 05/30/2010
          07/04/2010 - 07/11/2010
          07/11/2010 - 07/18/2010
          08/08/2010 - 08/15/2010
          11/07/2010 - 11/14/2010
          11/14/2010 - 11/21/2010
          11/21/2010 - 11/28/2010
          11/28/2010 - 12/05/2010
          01/09/2011 - 01/16/2011
          01/30/2011 - 02/06/2011

7.07.2003
 
Why do I try to bring reason and sanity into people's inner turmoils? I can't even control mine some days, talk about a pretentious self-righteous moron.

(But then, if one isn't self-righteous, doesn't push what they feel is right..would you just float along with what everyone else says, no show of right or wrong?)

The worst bit of it is, I tend to get tangled up in things outside of, and usually far worse than, my own experience. So I *really* don't know what to do with it. But I don't know where these answers are coming from out of me, I just go with things, and it ends up sounding good and reasonable, it... I don't know. I guess all I do is look at the situation and try to piece together everyone's point of view on it, and put myself in their places and see what they see..but it's not just that, it's..I don't know. Extension of thought, I suppose, which also happens in my writing. I just try to get inside their head and see the world through their eyes..and the oddest thing about it is, that while sometimes I work at it, other times I don't and the words just come and somehow they work though I don't know where they come from... so maybe it is a Gift of sorts, and I should trust it more..goodness knows everyone else seems to trust it pretty well...

And I like being able to help, when I can, and I have to at least try... The worst of it, though, is when they don't seem to let you in, when you can't get through...because my heart's still tied up in it all, it's slipped out into their hand and they're clutching it still though they're unconscious, they're not at all aware of it anymore but the death-grip still holds fast.
And it hurts like hell but sometimes you've got to tear it away before it stops beating.

And now I'm probably being over-dramatic but the guy I'm supposedly dating is being dramatic, it's 2am, I have a dreadfully dramatic day ahead of me (with last-minute planning to carry out and confrontation and everything! such a splendid time for all..)

Great. And after near-on an hour of this, I have a nasty feeling he's just fucking with my head again.
Oh, no, wait. He is a little...but I'm seeing past it now which is good. I don't know if it's cos he's letting me or if I said something right, but I'm beneath the careless laugh he tried to fool me with.

Laur, I'd love to borrow C.S. Lewis' Four Loves... just in general, I need some more C.S. Lewis in my diet again. (I've drawn a little on Mere Christianity just now, about the important part, the real you, being the part that *chose* in a certain set of circumstances..but yeah.)

And now he's pulling in something someone else on aim said..great, so he's discussing this with at least two people, and probably pitting us against each other without realising it. (This doesn't surprise me, it's quite like him...) But they said something a little C.S. Lewis-y too... *laughs* Or it's just late and I'm reading into things by whatever's on my mind at the moment.

I've gotta let this thing go for now.. I need some sleep. 'night all.