Current music <3: Sigur Rôs.

...Laur, I hadn't really thought about the lyric to that song before...hrm. ..yeah, it *does* totally fit what you went through...but...you sound like you've put this all behind you now...I'm glad you've figured it out, settled it down, then..(..wish *I* could...but that's another story...).
And *I* don't think you were being overly melodramatic at *all*. ^_^

Daffy, you ever gonna update your blog..? ~_^

..had an interesting evening. Went over to my grandparents' house for supper with Dad and Teraa, and my Aunt Pat and Uncle Larry (no relation - or resemblance - to my fav drummer..which is a very good thing, I think..). And it was fun, after dinner we got into this whole big discussion..basically about how bad society's gotten, and whose fault *is* it? ...and debates over there are always fascinating, cos you've got like, my dad, who's a self-described red-neck conservative; my grandpa, who is..well..definitely of the elder generation ~_^, holds to all the standard values of good education, etc; and my aunt and uncle, who're tree-huggers (who both, oddly enough, have cpu-related jobs) and hold a rather liberal viewpoint on things. So yeah...it's interesting. ^_^ Great fun.
So Aunt Pat's talkin' about all this stuff...and asks what *I* think of it, being of the younger, current generation, y'know? So I got into the discussion...she's tryin' to put some blame on video and computer games, I said no, I won't blame those at *all*. Matantis and Brian spend *hours* playing Return to Castle Wolfenstein, happily shooting away at Nazis - but they'd *never* *really* hurt anyone. ...even Teraa made some valid points, she was talking about how this one kid in her grade is like, psycho-violent and basiaclly just..bad, and he gets all this special treatment, aids goin' around to classes with him..they gave him a frickin' *hamster*, so he can build "nuturing skills"---! ...and even Teraa sees that this just makes it worse, and isn't fair in the *least*... Talked about school, how there's no respect for teachers, for elder students...and Grandpa went off on this thing, one of his teachers would leave fingerprints on this one kid if he was out of line, would just grab his arm or whatever, and he *got* respect. And Aunt Pat's like no, no, a teacher should *never* hurt a student...and I pointed out that maybe not a teacher, but at home - heck, *we* were spanked when we were little, an' it didn't scar us for life at all..tho I would've never thought so at the time, it prolly did us *some* good, anyway...
And yeah. Just went on and on... it was fun, it really was. I love debating. ^_^

..but I'll go now..*should* get some sleep tonight, picnic at B's tomorrow...carp, I've gotta get some food together--! -_-;; ...ah well... ...wanna try to get another desktop pic done tonight, tho...(ehmm, even tho I've done like, what, *four* already today? ~_^;)

 
But yeah... *sigh*...this kinda sounds a li'l *too* familiar...(from a doujinshi by the guy who does megatokyo).
...
...'cept *I'm* the one writtin' the notes...

 
<3 Labyrinth!!!!!!! ^_^ Hooray for dvds!!!! ^_^ Bonus features..more Jareth! More Bowie! Woo!!! ^_^
...
Right.
...new desktop pics in progress, Folken-sama and Jareth. ^_^

 
Hey Laur...hope you told Megan that I probably *would* use teleporting powers to materialize at a U2 concert--! ^_^ ...front row. ..or, y'know, next to the drumkit...^_~
...but yeah...agree with you there..." '...do you have any enemies?'
I thought about it, then finally shrugged. 'Guerras. Odio.' Then I translated it. 'War. Hate.' "

 
*yawn*...what was that "sleep" I was going to get, again..?...*sigh*...just added a *ton* of new glam artwork over on Desert Songs...I hadn't updated in a week or two, felt bad...
...'course now, I'm *really* going to bed..so tired..I was dozing off at like, 7pm tonight...that was different...

Music <3s of the evening: Luna Sea, Sugizo (*of* Luna Sea ^_^), Sigur Rós

 
Ok... so it turns out that Dr. Sevron, from Star Trek episode "The Way To Eden" is *not* the same guy as Saavedro from Myst III: Exile. (Each are played by Skip Homeier and Brad Dourif, respectively..thank you startrek.com and myst3.com.) ...but they *look* and *act* *sooooo* much alike---! ...even *with* the time gap, I was almost sure it was the same guy---! (Granted, I haven't played Exile in a bit, but-- still!!!)
And *dude*!!! Saavedro is Wormtongue in LotR!!!! ...crazyness...he was in Nightwatch too! ... ...*'nanda needs to pay more attention to people*..! (More inof than asked for found on the dude's website.)
..and I'm *trying* to get pics up here...but boomspeed...yeah. Doesn't seem to exist today... ...*lightbulb*. Daffy, you didn't just register with them, did you??? ~_^

 
Ahhhhh....did my english presentation today! ..spent nearly all of first block tryin' to get the silly computers to open and run it properly...worked fine, once we shut off their dumb security--!
..'cept then, when I went to present...only like, four of my songs played. !!!!!!!....-_-#....blah.
Ah well...went pretty well, otherwise...videos worked, which was good. ^_^
...so now maybe I'll stop neglecting Desert Songs, and get some new stuff up---! ^_^;;
Actually, what I'd like to do, is get that powerpoint online, somehow...don't just wanna upload the file, cos people often mistrust d/ning, and people could just, y'know steal it. (Ehrm, that is, assuming anyone *visits* the page---! -_-;) Hrm. *shrug* Ah well...problem for another day. For now, think I'll just make some more of my background images into desktop pics. ^_^

 
...it's kind of strange, knowing so much about a band..and making them such a huge part of your life..U2 mean so much to me, as a band, their music, and as individuals.....and looking at those pics of Bono just now..it was strange, I started thinking about how different these pics look from the ones of him in the same country (Ethiopia, I believe) back in '85 or so...thinking about how much he's changed, how much the situation's changed, his reason for and experiences while being there, how much the world itself has changed...and it's like I'm looking back on my *own* memories, almost...which's really actually prolly kinda creepy...but...it feels I've known these guys forever...I mean, ok, not quite, I'm constantly finding quotes and odd little stories about them that take me *completely* by surprise...and I don't want to claim that I know them, tho it looks like I am..it's just...gah. Maybe it's impossible to explain, it's only something for someone who's got such a deep connection with a person/people they've never even met to understand...
...
...but I *had* actually intended to get some sleep tonight---! -_-;;;

 
Hey Laur?..I think we *all* wanna be superheroes some days...
(..tho I'm more likely to just want to be Bono...close to the same thing sometimes, ne?)



...and btw, on a lighter note... <3 anime. ^_^ ...so pretty.....I wanna be able to draw like that...*sigh*. (The one up-side to reading megatokyo is that the artist *does* talk about how he does stuff, how long it takes him...and it'll take him hours to do one decent drawing. So I don't feel *too* terrible...)

...and randomly decided to d/n some Sigur Rós again...<3...forgot how beautiful it is...

 
Wah! Someone *else* who can't stand those stupid Windows-assistant-things that pop up at random and annoy you! ^_^ ...figures I could count on Largo, from Megatokyo, to agree on that one.. ~_^

 




What Type of Villain are You?

mutedfaith.com /
<º>

Obsessive, yes. Exibit said obsession in odd ways? Most likely (to other people's eyes, anyway..I write stories involving U2, penguins, and lemons).
...stalker?...there's a terrible, terrible irony there...
...
...wow...

 
And in Largo's rant at the bottom here...wow. ...that *is* a different concept for a game...trying to decide if it's kinda cool or just disturbing... -_-;
...
...I remember when we thought Mario and DuckHunt were seriously frickin' awesome...when we played Commander Keen *over* and *over* and *over*...and Word Rescue, primarily cos it reminded us of Mario. And we didn't have a Nintendo or any gaming system of any sort (at the time).
...kinda miss those days, y'know? I mean, Final Fantasy and all are great, but...the simple games were great, too...and they were a lot easier to *stop playing* for awhile, too... -_-;

 
Thanks to this random blog (which's primarily in...ah-hah. Portugese.) for cool quote:
''Music, the representation of invisible things'' - Leonardo da Vinci
^_^
...in other news, I have just spent almost an entire afternoon randomly wandering around the internet, primarily reading megatokyo, gazing longingly at the works of various people who can actually *draw*, and trying to find stuff by all these bands that'll be doing concerts here in the next two weeks...(need to get to two concerts by the time school ends - music history concert reviews... -_-;;;)...I miss Napster!!!!! -_-,

 
Dude, Piro's rant at the bottom of this page is, sadly, *so true*...I used to *hate* all of Teraa's j-pop music...and now? ..I wanna buy an Escaflowne cd... ^_^;;;

 
Thanks, Daffy...who knows if I'll ever actually get around to goin' all thru the banquet, you did a decent enough job of it for me. ~_^ ..and thanks, too...for helpin' encourage me etc... ^_^ for us. ~_^
.and Laur...same goes for me as goes for Daffy...I think you're the thinnest of the three of us!...not that that matters...*sigh*, I know, I say it, but do *I* mean it?..I *try* to...and yeah, I wish I was thinner too some days (ok, maybe a lot of days, depends)...Daffy's thoughts and doubts there are the same as mine, I *should* exercise at least *some*, and I always mean to, but never quite follow thru etc...and family comments on what I wear *do* get to me sometimes, tho I try not to let them....and I wonder if any guy'll ever like me...cos Blake? *sigh*..who knows?...the other night was *perfect*, it really and truly was...but...was it just a random blip? just the night, and the dance, and being seniors, and having known each other so long? or was it more, like I hope?...*sigh*.....but I *do* wish you had someone, too, Laur...tho I'm sure you'll find someone.
...I dunno...I just have this subconscious faith that everything will work out right in the end...God does things/lets things happen for a reason, right? Right. So however things look now...it'll work for the best in the end.

And Daffy...yeah, I agree...going from daydream to reality seems impossible, it really and truly does...but...it's not...(this is something *I've* got to remember, as well..)...we've *all* got to be braver, I think...(don't ask me how, cos I sure as heck don't know..if I did, *I* wouldn't be in this rut!).

So yeah... Blake wrote me the sweetest message in my yearbook (I'll undoubtedly have it memorised soon--! ^_^;), and I feel so bad cos the one I'd written in his, prior to him signing mine, was so..I dunno..just..upbeat and off-the-cuff, y'know?..avoiding/glossing over the things I really wanted to say...and partly cos I knew Dan'd read it, but also cos...I knew Lani etc. could see it, too...and...I didn't know if Blake would *want* them to see it...he *did* take Amber to the prom...but we're going to ignore that just now...(what happened to my whole epiphany a month or so ago, that it didn't matter, I was free??..) ...and I hit that doubt, again, the same thing that would've kept me from dancing with him, from pulling him close, from kissing his cheek...(thank you Heather for intimidating me, thank you Daf and Laur and Calypso for convincing me)...
...stupid...*why* am I always like this? I always *have* been...damnit, I *have* to give him that note, whether I still want to in the morning or not..."I don't always say what I mean...about how much people mean to me..."...
...
...and now, I've got my daydream for the end of the year...God, help me make that one come true, too!
...
...but I *can't* let this lovesick-teen world envelope me entirely...gotta keep reading the paper, blogs, Mere Christianity, LotR, to keep my mind from looping in endless circles, like it so very easily could...I don't *want* to lose what I've found for myself this past year or so, this whole wider world, *apart* from every-day teenage drama...cos I hate it, but it's so easy to get sucked into, addicting, you don't *really* want to leave once you're in (or, at least, you don't *think* you do)...and it's so very hard to pull back out...
...
*g*
...it's like AIM!
...so that entirely ruined the mood, but I was gonna go to bed *EARLY* tonight...dangit...once again, didn't happen...*sigh*...

 
Sorry, Laur, you may have to wait a bit yet for that update etc... I've been workin' on my powerpoint again nonstop since about suppertime...and am *just* finishing now. ...gah, the thing is *AWESOME*!!!!! ^_^ ...let's just pray it *works* on the school computers---! -_-;;;

..but dude...you've learnt how to crack jokes in Spanish, Laur??? ..wow....*g* (Actually, if I were still in spanish, I'd prolly be tryin' to...prolly failing, but trying, anyway... ... ..hey, that's a Bono line.."..it's about trying, maybe, maybe failing, but at least trying..this is called "I Fall Down"..." ^_^)
But your final paper sounds *awesome*.... ^_^

..an' I'm a sad, sad child, too...I worked Virgin Prunes *and* U2 into my powerpoint, multiple times...*and* I've got Mackie in there. And Larry. In drag. *evil grin* *Mackie-horns sprouting again*...
...see, you've just gotta make these projects *fun* for *yourself*, right Laur? ~_^

 
..and Laur, I've got more to say to you, and more to say on that night in general, but..not tonight...I'm so very, very tired...

 
Ahh...soooo tired, tho mostly happy...tho sad, too....*sigh*..."Africa" was the *best* *EVER* today, at the chicken bbq--errr, "Community Music Festival", excuse me.. ~_^
But yeah. Need sleep. have it all *written* up, but need sleep tonight, so mayhap later...

..tho I promised I'd tell about last night, sooo.... ^_^
Ok. Once again, it's all *written* up, and I don't want to type it all tonight, maybe later I will, but for now... the imp. part. ~_^
...*on Cloud 23*.... ~_^
..excerpts from the Choral Banquet (some names changed ~_^ ..tho this's mostly taken straight from my hardcopy of this..*g*):
While we were at the table, prior to getting food, Blake'd come over to compliment my skirt [*note: Daf and I had taken the wonderfully tacky '70s curtains from the old choir room, and turned them into wrap-around skirts ^_^]...he was standin' there by me for a minute, so I'm like, *Soooo*, how's yer weekend goin'? He said it was fine, "except [*his* "Calypso", I s'pose, taking the original reason for the name!]'s sitting next to me." Oh dear, that's not cool... "She moved the whole table to sit by me!" And then, I got brave... "So, are we gonna need protection during slow songs tonight?" "Oh, yeah, thanks. ..she hasn't asked me to save her a dance yet. She will, though." "So tell her you're otherwise occupied [or was it previously engaged..?]." "Okay, I will."
...I'd been talking to everyone, cos I really wanted to dance with him...one last timme...and I didn't at the band banquet [...]
[...]
Later on... Heather and I went off to the ladies' room. And talked a bit. I was tellin' her...I want to dance with him, but...I want it to be special... "Well, I'm gonna dance with [carp, forgot his code name--! Guy H-2, then.], and I'm gonna give him a hug at the end.." "Yeah, I was thinking about that.." "..and I might try for a quick kiss on the cheek.." "..yeah, I was thinking about that, too..." ...I wanted him to hold me close... everytime we've danced, there's been space between us (same with every guy I've danced with)..and I didn't want that this time, wanted to be right up against him, lay my head on his chest...give him a quick kiss on the side of the cheek as I pulled away...but this was all daydream, a daydream I'd had so many times before...
"If you do it, I'll do it."
"Wil you for real?"
"Yeah, but you've got to, too... c'mon, you can do it!"
..and we slapped/shook hands on it.

..and I told Daf and Laur and Calypso, and...I can't even tell you how much the three of them and Heather helped me...*they're* the ones that helped me get from daydream to reality...and I haven't the time to go into it here, now, cos it's late and I need to sleep, but...you guys know what you did. Thank you. From the bottom of my heart...you've given me one of the best nights of my life. Thank you...

..and there were many other fun and great things that night, but I'm skipping ahead to the part I really wanted to get to here...

..danced a little...
..and then a slow song came on.
And I looked frantically about for Blake [There'd only been two slow songs at the band banquet the night before, one right after the other - Heather and I knew we had to grab the chance as soon as it came.], while motioning Heather to go get "H-2"!
..and then I saw him, rushed over to him...and we stepped more onto the dance floor together, but he was dustracted...
..."Calypso-K" [as we will call her here] was there. [Blake:]"You don't mind, do you? I'll dance with you the next one." [Me, in the seemingly tteasing tone I take on with her..tho I'm being much more serious than she knows:} "I already claimed him, go away." "I did promise her first." "yeah. So go away"...
And...
... <3 .... cloud 23.... .... !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ... ... <3 .... [<- repeat throughout the next part ^_^]
...
I put my arms around his neck, he put his arms around me, and..., we were touching...and I lay my head on his chest...
[This is all in a seeming half-joking manner, tho I wasn't really joking.. ...]"Thank you!"
"No problem...anything for Blake."
...
"I couldn't just let her do that to you..."
And I think I remember all that we said, close to exact words, but I won't write it all here...tho I have it all written down, so *I'll* never forget...
[Ananda:] "Y'know, my very first slow dance ever was with you.."
"Really?"
"Yeah, the "Annie"-thing.."
"Oh yeah... I think that was my first dance ever, was after "Annie"..."
...
[Blake:] "Did you ever get your senior pictures?"
"Ehhhrrrmmm...no.."
"I need one."
"I know, don't worry, I'll get you one."
...
...and at some point, we started talking about how few days were left...and how much we'll miss our friends...
[me:]"I'm gonna miss you [guys?] so much..."
"Me too.."
..and we held each other tighter for a moment...
...
[Blake:]"I'm not gonna be able to walk out of those doors on the last day of school. I'm just goning to stand there..."
"Yeah, I won't be able to either.. ..we'll just stay after on the last day of school!"
*laughing*
"Yeah..."
...
[me:] "If I stay the last day and miss my bus, will you give me a ride home?"
*laughing*
"Sure... tho Dan's gonna want a ride home, too."
"Ah, forget him.."
...
[Ananda:] "You've been my friend since preschool..."
"Yeah, I've known you longer than anyone else..."
...and I can't remember what else we said after all that, whether it was I love you or I'm gonna miss you or nothing at all...
...the song was ending, I was holding on til the end...and...
I lifted my head up (fearful for a moment I wouldn't be able to reach - he's taller'n me, dangit!), and kissed him, quickly, prolly closer to the back of his jaw, really... and no hesitation, he held me close and I held him close, and he laid his head on mine, his cheek against mine...he was kinda stubbly, I can feel it still...and we stayed that way for a moment...and then I think another song was starting, we let each other go..
"Thank you.." I said, as I hurried off to go find Heather...

And I found her, we'd *both* followed thru, and we ran outside and screamed. ^_^

...but...I mean...it really...my dream, since *preschool*...and now...just...daydream become reality...I honestly *have* daydreamt that, *so* many times...but my daydreams have *never* come true before...
...
..<3...
...
...(and what topped it all off? *mad evil giggle* ...later, a second slow song played, we were up on the balcony, overlooking the scene below..and "Calypso-K" was dancing with Blake, and...hehehe!...there was like, a foot of space between them.
^_^

 
..ignore all recent ramblings on Folken, Brian, etc...
...I've just had one of *the* best nights of my life...
(Yes, this includes the U2 concerts--!)
..details to come possibly tomorrow, possibly later...*far* too late now, I've been writing it all up, to have a tangible copy of it all...
<3 Blake.
...*on cloud 42...or should it be 23..? ~_^*
**~****~~~~~**~**~***~**~~~~***~**~**~***~**~~~*~*~~~**~*~**~*